This weekend I was pretty grumpy was a little loney because a new release came out for Jason’s video game. This means he’s played as many as 18 hours a day and almost every night until wee morning hours. At least he took a break for a ten minutes dinner. Lol! I’m glad I have two cuties to spend time with all the time.
I rejected an opportunity to do something that was outside of my comfort zone, but could have been really fun; and because of my nerves. I decided not to do it. Often times I take that as a sign from God, to not do something when I feel really uncomfortable about it, because He’s spoken to me many times that way. It would have been an opportunity once a week to get out of the house and do something for me and even get a little bit of money for doing it, but decided it wasn’t worth it because I was worried about being away from the kids, and missing out on something fun with my family. I rationalized its by saying it wasn’t enough money for the time it would take me- which is true. I have no choice, but to trust my initial instinct, since I was praying for God’s answer, but I do feel some amount of regret, that I am not brave enough- but at least my worry is gone! I think I’ve lost a bit of myself after having kids. I love my family more than anything in the whole world. And my babies are so important to me. I just don’t feel like a ‘me’ sometimes.I feel like a mommy machine. All day, all night. I have so much respect for moms who work full time and our mommies too. I can’t imagine how hard that would be, to leave your kids all the time. I couldn’t even do it once a week. I feel so silly for complaining because I am so lucky that I don’t have to do that, it is a true blessing.
I am so thankful that the sun finally came out, I’m sure that a lot of my feeling blue this weekend was because of the rainy weather. A girl can only take so many gloomy days. I need some vitamin D! I’m hoping my I’m in a better mood this week! 🙂